Self-Sabotaging| Destructive Behaviors

“Behavior is said to be self-sabotaging when it creates problems and interferes with long-standing goals”

Negative Self-Talk & Doubtful Thinking

..Is like being in the middle of the ocean and shooting bullets into your own boat

We all have those moments where everything seems to be going wrong… and instead of accepting the situation as it is, we blame ourselves. Of course there are somethings that are in our control, but a lot of life is simply not in our control. It is all about how you respond; life happens for us, not to us. Manifestation is a real and active energy allowing you to wish anything into existence. That’s not going to happen overnight, but that’s a good thing because it allows you to grow through the journey & define for yourself what really matters. A big part of the journey is keeping a positive mindset. Something as simple as “I’m going to make a difference today” as opposed to “Ugh, I bet it’s going to be just as bad as the other day”. Do not allow fear and negativity to cloud your judgement it will only stop you from progressing.

Remember, your mind is an incredibly fertile garden. If you are constantly thinking negative, all that will grow is weeds. From personal experience, let me tell you, it will be an arduous process trying to pull them all out. Instead wake up each morning and nurture yourself mind with positive thoughts, planting them so your mind can grow into a beautiful garden.

Using Food to “Feel”

“Emotional eating doesn’t heal emotional issues”

As humans, we have constant loops when it comes to consumption. Going back to that bag of chips we swore we wouldn’t open again until tomorrow. 8 shots down, feeling sick and suddenly thinking about the promise you made to yourself about not drinking anymore. Binge eating at fast-food places, feeling guilty and now having to abide by some random, restricting, diet. Picking up weight-loss pills because the ad on the tv said they’d work— Why do we consume all of these things? Truth is: because we have no self control.

They say that “having moderation is key” but I really don’t think that’s effective. Can anyone relate? Maybe you’re really good one day, and only have one or two cookies, but the next day you’re full of emotions and you grab the whole box! Maybe you even say to yourself “well, I’ve been really good this whole week. I deserve this.” Why do you feel deserving of foods that in reality, make you sick? Maybe it’s really a problem with self-worth & not being clear on what we are deserving of.

When celebrating something good, we tend to eat foods we have an emotional attachment to. In reality, it’s not the food, but the memories we are yearning for that come with eating and drinking (alcohol is glorified poison, lets be real). Realize that you are not living in the moment— you are living in the past hoping to feel those same feelings. You are in-fact self sabotaging yourself in this regard. Instead of celebrating with junk food, consume something that can sustain your happiness all day; not just while you’re eating. When you feel authentically good about an acheivement it’s about living that feeling in that moment; not trying to add onto it or enhance it in some way. Try to feel good about yourself by yourself. You will reap more benefits when you acknowledge what you’ve done with a clear mind. 

External Influences Processed Internally

“Comparison is the greatest theif of joy”

Society tells you “you’re not worthy” if you don’t look a certain way or, “you’re not cool” if you don’t have the newest items. I’m sure we’ve all heard it, but do you realize how much impact it actually has on your life? Quite a lot actually; when was the last time you sat by yourself and reflected on what actually makes your life meaningful.? No pressure, not even from yourself, just exploring real possibilities.

When you hang out with friends and family, are they uplifting you or degrading you? Small, sly, jokes may seem harmless but it is in-fact an attack on you. Those little jokes can build up subconsciously and start to make you feel bad about yourself. Be careful who you give your energy to.. find your true voice— who are you without all of those external influences.? Strip away all of comments and opinions people have had of you.. what are you left with? If you feel you are left with nothing then you have put all of your self-worth into the hands of others and that is self-sabotage. Not everyone has the same goals as you and that’s okay.  Try to actively surround yourself with people that encourage your growth. You’ll be pleased to find that you can now will find your own internal self-worth and express it externally in a healthier way. Compare yourself only to yourself and there you will find a worthy competitor. 

Tips To Help

  1. Acknowledge the moment you start drowning yourself in negative thoughts and activly shift them to think of more positive things. Write down at least three things you are greatful for in that moment. Or, bombard yourself with good memories, like that time on vacation where time stopped and everything was just perfect. GROW YOUR GARDEN; NO WEEDS ALLOWED. 
  2. When you want to binge on something, binge on fresh fruit or a huge salad. Eating whole-foods allows you to dig deeper into your whole-self to find out what the real emotional problem is.
  3. When someone or something makes you feel less than worthy– meditate, read, or do some art. Express yourself in a way that makes you feel good about yourself. You’ll always have something new to discover about yourself. 

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